


Needs

by asliceofpie



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Age Play, Angst, Artist Zayn, Death, F/M, Fluff, Little Zayn, M/M, Mentions of Cancer, Non-Sexual Age Play, OT5 Friendship, Other, Past Abuse, Past Character Death, Therapist Liam, University Student Harry, University Student Louis, Zayn-centric, hairstylist Niall, orphan Zayn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-06
Updated: 2016-07-25
Packaged: 2018-06-06 18:08:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 20,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6764551
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/asliceofpie/pseuds/asliceofpie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zayn Malik has never had an easy life. Ever since he was born hes gone through more difficulties than the average child. He was born early, thus having a few developmental issues that his parents mostly ignored. They tried their hardest to treat him normal. As Zayn grows he realizes his life was far from normal. Now, he's living with his best friends, Louis and Harry. They have been there for him since he was super small. They mean the world to him and he has strong desires to please them.</p><p>Zayn starts to struggle and resorts to other ways of comfort. He never really heard of Age play. But some how he falls into the habits of your average Little without even knowing it. He knows he's not 'normal'. So he hides his secret until one day it all explodes.</p><p>Will any of his friends be there when it all comes out? Or will he be forced to be on his own, yet again?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

He started doing this unconsciously. You see he didn't really want for this to happen. But when it did...he had no real intention of stopping it.  
It started when his mum sent him his old teddy bear in the post. Maybe even before that. He cant remember. Life gets blurry sometimes. He had a sudden urge to sleep with the bear. He wanted to use it as a form of comfort. So he did. And he started sleeping a bit better. It just quickly made a habit of it. 

But, of course it didn't stop at the bear. He started sneaking around, looking for ways to get that desired form of comfort he longed for. And the things he fount soothing..if his friends ever fount out.

He hated sneaking around his best friends and flat mates. Louis and Harry were everything to him. Yet, he knew he couldn't trust them with this secret. They wouldn't even understand. He did feel a little less jumpy around his new found friend, Niall. He was just all smiles and so easy going. He wouldn't tease Zayn when he walked into the room, rubbing his eyes, sleepily. His bear tucked firmly under his arm, wanting nothing but to have a cuddle. Niall simply coos at the sight and give him exactly what he craved. Hugs and affection. All the love in the world. He could trust Niall. So he'd tell him soon. He did get a little sad that he wouldn't be able to tell Louis and Harry just yet. After all, he's known them since he was in primary school. 

But Niall didn't judge him when he 'acted like a baby'. Or when he nibbled at his food. Or had an off day and whined about nearly everything. Not even when he refused to watch another scary film or when he carried 'round the old ratted bear. He was always there for him.

Harry and Lou loves him. He knows that. That's why he doesn't get offended when they tease him about being so small. There's no animosity between the three of them. But he is a bit sensitive to the baby jokes these days. They never have secrets between them. But now he's holding the biggest secret ever.

He's comforted by the standard baby items and craves the affection and love from others near him.


	2. Behaviors

Niall's POV

I'm currently at Zayn, Louis, and Harry's flat. We were simply catching up and chilling. I laughed as I watched Louis push his hands into Harry's face, blocking his view from the screen.

“No fair! Lou,you always cheat!” Harry whined as Louis grinned. I laugh at them, shaking my head.

“Not my fault you need your eyes to play fifa!” He yelled at the curly lad. 

“Well, it's my turn!” I grab the controller from Louis who huffed.

“Um, its the winner against the new player. Not loser against new player.” I laugh loudly, shaking my head at him.

“You are the loser, Lou. Harry totally smashed that match. You cheated your arse off”

Louis gasps loudly and gets up, “Assholes.” He grumbles, walking out the room as if I just told a tale. Harry giggles at him and starts a new game with me. We play silently for awhile until someone makes a lot of noise unlocking the house door. I glance at it and smile with anticipation. Of course that could only be one person. Zayn.

The door finally opens and out comes the lovely raven haired boy I've grown to love over the last few months. 

“You alright, mate?” He closes the door and huffs as he sits down next to me on the sofa, completely ignoring my question.

I frown and go back to playing the game with more concentration. Louis enters the room and practically sit on harry. He glances over at Zayn and smirks mischievously. He leans over to Harry and whispers something to him. Harry then in return, widens his eyes slightly and shakes his head.

“What's the matter, Zee? Did you have a bit of wee again while waiting for the Maths exams again?” Zayn blushes brightly and stands up quickly.

“Fuck off.” He mumbles, heading upstairs without looking back. I turn to Louis and raise an eyebrow.

“So, he wet himself?” Harry gives him a look that reads 'don't you dare, or I'll beat you up.' But of course, Louis ignores that. Harry is like a bunny rabbit. Put up a strong fight but wouldn't really hurt you. Most likely, to hurt themselves over you.

“It's a funny little story, actually.” Louis starts.

“I swear to God, Louis. If you even dare..” Harry threatens. We both smile, knowing it's more of an empty threat than a wholeheartedly threat.

“Okay, As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted; You see, we were all going to take the maths exam and Zee was a ball of nerves. We were all trying to get him to relax but he wouldn't stop bouncing off the balls of his feet. So when he goes to get his exam I noticed a wet spot on his trousers. And let me tell you, I was petrified for the lad. He hadn't even noticed! And-” Harry cuts him off with a loud groan.

“Shut up, Lou! That's enough!” Harry frowns at his boyfriend.

“What's the big deal? Niall is his mate. He wont mind. Not like he's a complete stranger on the streets, yeah?” Just then Zayn enters the room with a small plastic cup full of milk. He been drinking milk a lot more lately. Which is weird, cause he told me he hated milk. I watch him as he takes a sit and takes a small sip of milk. He looks over at Louis and harry and frowns.

“Why are you lot so annoying? He doesn't need to here about that...why where you telling him about that..!” He whines. Louis laughs softly.

“No malicious intent here, mate!” Zayn rolls his eyes and leans back on the couch. Some milk spills on his shirt when he does so. He lets out another whine and puts the cup down.

“Stupid milk.” He frowns at the cup. I smile softly at his pouting face. I pause the game that had been long discarded. 

“Alright, Zee. Arms up.” Zayn blushes faintly and stares at me, wide eyed.

“What..don't need any help. Ill do it myself.” I laugh lightly and tug his hem gently.

“But I'm going to help you, okay?” He looks at me and nods slowly. He reluctantly lifts his arms ups and I pull his white v neck over his shoulders and head. I can feel Louis and Harry's eyes on me as I do so. I shrug, not caring if this raised some sort of suspicion to the pair of 'em. I sit back down, this time right besides him.

“So, are you done being a baby now?” Louis says, laughing lightly. Zayn rolls his eyes and leans back again, folding his arms over his chest.

“So, who's winning?” He asks, as if nothing just happened. I eye him with question. Something is going on with him and I'm going to find out as soon as possible. I mean, I could chalk it up to having a bad day. But he's been having a lot of those. Which makes me think, it's something else.  
..

Hours have passed since Zayn first came home. He's only become more whiny as the evening fell. Everyone was losing patience with his spoiled attitude. I'd hate to admit it, but the behavior was even starting to annoy me.

“Would you shut up? We're not watching UP again! We're watching Jessabelle.” Louis snaps at him, making him whine and curl into himself. I sigh as a thought crosses my mind. I frown slightly.

“Zayn, go get your bear.” He looks at me, wide eyed and shakes his head. A pout staying on his thin pink lips.

“Don't need a stupid bear.” He grumbles. Harry shakes his head as he sits back and watch Louis skips through the previews.

“Zayn, just go get your bear.” He frowns and gets up and goes upstairs. Louis laughs.

“That bear ain't gonna do shit. He needs to go take a nap or better yet, get laid.” I roll my eyes at Louis's stupid comments.

“I think he might be feeling down..or home sick. It's his mum's birthday this week.” Louis frowns and looks down. Harry furrows his eyebrows and instantly gets up and heads upstairs. 

“I'm stupid. So stupid. I kept teasing him all evening and completely forget his mum's birthday is tomorrow and she's all the way in Bradford..spending her 52nd birthday in Hospital.” He frowns at himself, being deep in thought. I nod sadly. 

His mother has stage 4 Leukemia and has recently chose to stop treatment. Saying she was okay with dying. After losing her husband 2 years ago and having Zayn move out, things just were never the same.Less than 5 minutes later, Harry comes downstairs with a giggling Zayn on his back. He runs over to the couches and drops Zayn down on one of them. He lets out a soft shrill as Harry attacks him with his over sized hands.

“S-stop Hazza!!” He continues to giggle wildly. Yes, fucking giggle. Because he is Zayn Malik and is unbelievably sweet. Louis and I smile at the sight before us. With one look at each other, we smirk and jump on top of Zayn, assaulting him with a surplus of tickles. He gasps out breaths as he laughs loudly. 

“S..s...stopppp, guys!” We eventually let up after a few minutes of endless tickles and the beautiful sound of his laughter filling the room. A red, messy haired Zayn smiles up at us. We all have a silent conversation and nod once at the common ground thought that seem to be floating in the air. We're all here for him, 100%. He grins and sits up. He reaches for the remote and clicks play.

“So, lets watch some scary movies, eh?” I smile at him and nod. We'll make him happy. We'll make him feel okay.


	3. We're more than friends, We're Family

(Zayn's pov)

It's Saturday morning. March 22nd. My mother's birthday. She's all I have left. But now she's sick. I sigh sadly as I lay on my king sized bed. The boys tell me we're going out today. I think they're trying to distract me. But I'll still know what's happening. Mum will be lying on a bed in a grossly clean hospital room, all alone as she coughs up blood and try to breathe deeply and calmly as possible. 

I frown at that thought. I sit up and reach for my purple binky off the nightstand and slip the small object in my mouth. I grab my teddy bear and lay back down, sighing softly. I've been trying to let up and not use these things anymore. However, days like today, it was particularly hard. 

I slowly started dozing off, finding comfort in the binky that bobbed under my nose. Peace. Relaxation. No more bad thoughts.

I hear a drowned out voice calling my name. I whine quietly. I thought was sleeping. Or I am still? I turn in my sleep and rub my nose as the voice appears to come closer. The binky falls out of my mouth, causing another whine to escape my mouth. I replace it instantly with my thumb, sucking softly on it once it's entered. I start dozing off again, not hearing anymore interruptions. I sigh softly, slumber taking me away again.

“Zee? Zayn..wake up.” I feel a hand caressing my cheek gently. I shift, whining as I was again interrupted. I open my heavy eyes slowly. I stare at the person before me, blinking a few times as my vision adjusted to the mostly dark room. 

“Wou?” I blush, realizing my thumb was in my mouth, I remove my hand and stare at him. “What is it?” I ask, annoyed because he woke me up. 

“We're about to get going. So come on, get up so we can have a great day!” Louis says, way too cheerful for the early morning. 

“But it's like 5am. Let me sleep...please.” Louis frowns at me.

“Are you okay? You're not hurting, are you? You were sucking your thumb. You use to do that when we were small. Every time you got hurt or bullied, you'd do so and curl into a little ball.” I frown slightly and blush.

“I'll get up. Just go, yeah?” He sighs but nods anyway. I watch as he walks out and sits up slowly. Man, that was too close. I really need to stop this before it's too late. I pick up my binky and bear and climb out of bed. They've never came this close to finding out my secret. I stuff the items in a box and place it in the far back of my closet. I take a hoodie off a hanger and slip it over my bare chest. I walk into the washroom where I quickly take a pee, not liking how cold the floor was against my bare feet. When I finish I brush my teeth quietly and rinse my mouth. I wash my face and run a damp hand through my messy bed hair. I walk down the stairs on my tip toes. I enter the living room and slightly whine at the sight of Niall and Harry cuddling. I walk over and climb in between the pair of them. I lay my head on Harry's chest and sigh softly, shutting my eyes.

“I know, it's too early and cold.” He says softly. I nod as I got comfortable in his warm arms. 

Minutes later, Louis makes his way down the stairs with a small duffel bag. “Come on boys! We have an adventure to go on!” He yells, enthusiastically. Niall laughs and jumps up. I simply lean closer to Harry, pouting slightly. Harry smiles down at me and rubs my back softly. 

“I'll carry you.” He says quietly. He stands up and scoops me up from the white sofa. I cuddle into him as I'm carried out to the car. He sets me down and buckles me up. Surprisingly, I don't protest. It feels good to be taken care of. Even if it's just for a few minutes. I curl into myself and close my eyes as the car moves. 

Don't hear much after that but soft whispers and hums of music from the radio. 

(Niall's POV)

I sat in the back with Zayn as we drove to Bradford. He has been struggling to find a whilst attending University. So the boys and I though we'd surprise him and bring him to see his mum. He has no idea and will be surprise, to say the least.

We've been driving for an hour when I turn to see if he was still awake. Harry and Louis were singing quietly along with the radio so no one seem to notice Zayn making soft sucking noises. I stare at him intently, trying to see what he was doing, as his arm was in his face. He slightly moves and my eyes widen at the sight before. He was sucking his thumb. I frown slightly. I've known him for quite some time now and haven't noticed him ever sucking his thumb. 

“Guys, since when did Zayn suck his thumb?” I ask, genuinely confused. I've slept over so many times and not once noticed this habit. Sure, he carries around a old teddy bear and loves cuddles and from time to time he is whiny. But that's just his character. Harry and Louis exchange a look and have a silent conversation that have no idea what it means. I sigh.

“Did you not hear me? Why does he suck his thumb at his age?” Harry sighs.

“Be quiet, alright? You'll wake him. It's going to be a hard day for him. Let him be.” Things get hard for me, but I don't suck my thumb. I usually drop tense topics, but this is Zayn we're talking about. If he's mentally slow or something, I deserve to know.

“Guys! What are you hiding from me!?”

“Pipe down, will yah!? Now, leave it. Close your eyes and try to get some rest.” I frown and fold my arms. I guess I'll have to find out by myself.

Two hours later we finally arrive at our destination. I'm first to hop out of the car and stretch my long limbs. Everyone else soon follows. Louis grabs the duffel bag and locks up. We go and check into the hotel and get settled in our room. 

“Alright, lads! How about we shower, get some food in us and do a bit of shopping?” Louis says, enthusiastically. Harry and I simply nod, knowing his plans for the day already. Zayn, however, huffed in annoyance.

“What's the point of going to a hotel in the middle of the city just to do shopping? I have an exam today! I've gotta be back home by 5.” Louis sighs softly.

“Zee, what's one exam? You wouldn't be able to focus anyway. Now go watch your pretty arse and come have breakie!” Zayn frowns but goes to the toilet anyway. Soon we hear water running.

“Okay, I'll get his clothes out. Harry, go order room service. Get his favorite. Niall, you call the hospital and double check the visitors hours.” We all nod at Louis's commands and do what he asks of us.

I dial the hospital's number and wait to get a hold of someone. From where I sat, I can hear Zayn's soft voice singing in the showers and I smile to myself. He's got a great voice. Should definitely use it more.. After 5 minutes or so, a representative answers and tells me the visitor hours. Which happens to start at 9 am. But I know we aren't going until a bit later, considering that we're going to the mall. Just as I hang up, Zayn appears out of the washroom . He lays on the bed in just a towel and stretches his arms and legs. His wet hair splayed across the white pillow covers,. I check him out slightly, biting my bottom lip as I did so. He looked great, in my opinion. He was a bit skinnier than I last remembered. His sort of muscular chests pressed out ever so slightly. Tattoos scattered all over his body in all sorts of places. The heart on his hip was one of my favorites. If I was to somehow hook up with him, I'd pay extra attention to it. Louis clears his throat causing we to look over at him. He had an eyebrow raised and a stern look on his face. I blush brightly, knowing I've been caught checking out my best mate..

“Zayn, babe, put your leg down. We can see your manhood. What's the time Niall?” Louis says. He obeys and lays flat on the bed. He makes a soft noise and motions for Louis to come over. I watch as Louis makes his way near the darker lad.

“Um it's 9:30..” I mumble, watching him climb onto the bed and lay besides him. He cuddles with him and smile softly at him. “You alright? I'm here..and so is Hazzabear. He's getting us some of the most delicious foods ever. We're gonna have a great day. I promise.” Zayn smiles softly and snuggles into him more. 

 

“Thank you so much Lou. I hate to admit it, but it's been so hard lately. You know..with the dreams..and the reality and then..” Louis shushes him and kisses hi head. I frown slightly, feeling confused. He was having nightmares? What are they hiding from me? I understand that today is cuddle Zayn day but why all the codes and the secrets. Just as I was about to ask what dreams, harry enters the room.

 

“Room service, boys and boys!” he says, cheerfully. “We have waffles, bacon, eggs, strudels! And a huge arrangement of fruit.” Zayn giggles and gets up, adjusting the falling towel. He sits down by harry and instantly digs in. I smile and join the pair of them. I'll just have to talk to him later.

After breakfast and everyone showering, we finally make our way to the nearest mall. The whole drive I was wondering how I should approach Zayn about this stuff. I'm supposed to be one of his best friends. I'll probably have to wait until later, since this day is suppose to be a happy day. “Zee, lets get your mum a gift and send in the post.” He grins and looks down.

“I think she'll like that.” He says softly. We enter the first jewelry shop we see. We go and look for something nice. It takes us almost 30 minutes before he finally decides on a diamond necklace that says love mum on the back of a simple pink and white heart. It's so Zayn. Few words, much meaning. After having it wrapped Louis drags Zayn into Primark while me Harry opt for a shoe shop instead.

“Harry..what's wrong with Zayn?” I ask, as Harry tries on some brown hiking boots. He frowns at me.

“Little Niall, if you keep acting as if he being who he is, is a bad thing then I'm going to have to punch you in that sweet nose of yours. Nothing is wrong with him. His mum is sick. His dad is dead. His sisters are also..” He stops abruptly, sighing heavily. He looks at me.

“He has been through a lot. Nothing is wrong with him. I really hate that you keep asking that. He's the sweetest person I know.” I frown and look down.

“I didn't mean it in a bad way. Just.. I don't know everything and I thought we were best friends. We're suppose to be close.” Harry laughs softly and puts his own shoe back on.

“We have known him since he was in diapers. We know everything because we're family. Not just friends. You're still a friend. So just wait..until you're family.” I sigh and nod once, biting my lip. I suddenly felt jealous.

“Lou is going to meet us outside. We're going to hospital. He's gonna need all of us. His mum is really ill. You're with us, right?” I nod immediately and leave out with him.

Here goes nothing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter 3 will be a lot longer. I decided to post 2 since 1 was so short.Tell me if you prefer the POVS or third person pov only?


	4. Visits & Smiles

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry i was gone for awhile. My computer was down, but now im back!   
> && i'm gonna change my writing to 3rd POV soon, as i do change the povs a little too much.

(Zayn's POV)

Louis and I sit in the car and patiently wait for Niall and Harry. I sigh softly. I appreciate what the boys are trying to do for me today, but its still a known fact that mum is dying in a hospital. I lay against the window and listen to Sam Smith's soft voice ringing through my ears. I smile lightly, his voice being some sort of comfort to me. I close my eyes and start dozing off. My thumb rests near my mouth as I drift into a slumber. His soft yet soulful voice warms my inside as a float between consciousness and restful state.

“Zayn, are you sucking your thumb again, mate?” I open my eyes, being disturbed by Louis, yet again. I sit up and move my hand from face. A small blush coats my cheek. I hadn't start sucking my thumb yet, had I?

We gotta talk, zee? What's going on?” he speaks softly, worry etched in his eyes. I shift uncomfortably.

“Drop it. I really don't want to talk. Where we going next?” Louis sighs at my uncooperative behaviour.

“There goes the boys.” I look over and Niall and harry walking over. I smile widely and hop out of the car. So glad to see my curly best friend and blond leprechaun. I run over and hug Harry tightly. He laughs lightly.

“Alright?” I sigh.

“Please, Hazzabear, make Louis stop questioning me. I love him, but he keeps asking if I'm hurting which makes me think about all the sad stuff.” I whisper to him as he rubs my back soothingly.

“Lemme talk to him. Go get in the car. Niall, go on with him.” Niall frowns but nods anyway. He walks with me to the car and we both get in the back seats. I look at him and smile softly as I buckle up.

“Do you know where we're going next, Ni?” He shrugs and looks at Louis and Harry. The pair was talking softly outside Harry looked rather upset, whilst Louis looked annoyed. I frown, feeling bad.

“I didn't mean to cause a tiff between them. Just Lou Lou was getting under me skin.” Niall nods once and looks at me.

“Don't take this the wrong way, but you know you act like a spoiled baby sometimes. You need to talk to us when you're hurting or upset cause you get agitated and whiny and everyone gets stressed and annoyed.” I look down at my denim covered legs. I felt gob smacked. I didn't know I was a problem to them. I know sometimes I whine but I didn't know I was feeling much like a burden. I clear my throat and look outside .

“Alright..” I whisper softly.

“Just..answer me this. Do you have any mental problems? That makes you I don't know, so sensitive and needy?” My mouth drops open wide in shock. Did he really just ask me that? My eyes suddenly well up with tears as I quickly climb out of the car and walk over to my best friends. I'm so sick and tired of this day! Everyone claims it's a day to make me feel better when really I just feel more like shit than ever before!I angrily wipe my tears away and run into Harry's arms.

“Why..are you guys being m..m..mean t..t..t..t.to me? I just.... I want my mu-um...so much. And I cant. And I don't understand. I'm not that 10 year old little kid that c..cant speak...and sucks his thumb because his uncle to..ouche..ed h..him again! I just want my m....m..mummy..” I cried, spilling out whatever was in my heart at the moment. I hugged harry tightly as I sniffled and hiccuped. I was a complete mess but Harry didn't seem to bothered by that. He rubs my back soothingly and whispers sweet words.

“Ohh, shh, baby. It's okay. It's all gonna be okay. Louis didn't mean to upset you. We're taking you to see your mum just now. Alright?” I wipe my eyes wildly, ignoring his protests that everything was just fine. It's never just fine.

“NO! Why is Niall making fun of me? He's suppose to be my best friend! Said I was burden! And that I might have mental issues! I know I cry a lot. And I'm not like you guys, but...but...why...?” Harry cuts me off by kissing all over my face.

“Louis will handle Niall. You, my friend, need to clean up that snotty face of yours and go visit your mum. Cause we're in Bradford! And Your mumma is only 45 minutes away. We all love you so much, okay? You're brilliant as you are! Beautiful, lovely, sensitive, intelligent Zayn. Wouldn't change a thing of you! Niall doesn't know you like we do. But he loves you all the same.” He says softly. He takes out a handkerchief and tell me to blow. I whine and take it from him cleaning my nose and face by myself. I feel so drained from my crying and yelling and it's barely noon.

“Harreh...did you say we're in Bradford?” I ask as I look around, taking in my surroundings. He laughs loudly.

“yes babe! We wanted to surprise you to see your mum.” I grin and throw my arms around his neck.

“Oh thank you, thank you, thank you!! I love you guys so much!” I grin at him. Maybe today will be better after all.

(LOUIS's POV)

I get into the car and sit by Niall. I sigh loudly. Things never go as I plan. 

“That was rude and insensitive of you.” Niall looks at me and then down at his hands.

“I just don't understand what it is or why. Because I feel like there's a why and not just his personality.” I smile sadly at him a. “Yeah, there's a lot of whys and we have fought and he has fought so so so hard to be treated like a normal 19 year old Uni student. Hes had a rough life. He needs all the love and support he can get. And when he is ready, he will tell you all. But you gotta give him time. Make him trust you and feel safe with you.” Niall frowns but nods.

“I probably just messed up, big time, eh?” I laugh and shrug.

“He loves you still. So.. I think..” Just then, Harry and Zayn enter the car. Harry smiles back at us.

“We've got a birthday to celebrate!” He cheers, causing Zayn to laugh softly. I grin at the pair of 'em. 

“Then start the car, curly!” He smiles at me and does just that. 

We drive for an hour, due to the lunch hour traffic. When we've finally arrive, we head straight for the cancer ward. Zayn was a ball of energy as he clung onto his mum's present. His eyes crinkle up in the corners, as he smiled happily. Look a bit like a child on Holiday. 

“Zayn, why don't you go in first? We will give ya two a bit of privacy.” He smiles at me and nods as he goes down the hall and knocks on a tall wooden door. Shortly after, he disappears within. I sigh and sit down by Harry and Niall.

“Thank God we got him here. He needed this more than we thought.” Harry says softly. I nod in agreement. We sit in the waiting room as he finally reunites with his mum after 3 years.

(Zayn's POV)

As I walk inside room 204, my heart shoots from the floor to the rooftops. I peak over the curtain and see my beautiful, yet frail mother laying in bed. She was sleeping so peacefully. I walk over quietly and sit down by her. I take her small, thin hand in mines and kiss each knuckle slowly as tears well up in my brown eyes. My beautiful mother is finally right in front me. I felt like I could die with happiness. 

I wait by her side for 20 minutes before she starts stirring in her sleep. I watch as she slowly wakens from her previous state of slumber. She makes a soft groaning sound as she turns onto her back. I frown at the sound of her in pain and tighten my grip on her hand. She slowly opens her eyes and look at me in shock.

“Zaynie? Is that really you?” I grin widely and come closer hugging her and kissing her as best as I could.

“Happy birthday, mummy.” I whisper to her as I hug her as tightly as possible. I could feel my mother's warm tears hitting my shoulder, but I didn't mind, because these were happy tears. I pull away slowly and look down at her. Her hands instantly go to my face and hair, caressing them softly.

“My zaynie. My sweet lil' boy. You're really here. How are you, bub? You've gotta tell me everything. The phone isn't the same, love.” I laugh softly and nod.

“Of course, mumma. The boys brought me here. Even, Niall, the new lad I was telling you bout? Yeah, they gone and surprised me and all..” I start. I explain whats been happening in the last 8 months. I tell her about school, and the boys, and how I started drawing again. I tell her whatever she possibly wanted to know. 

After 35 minutes of non stop talking between the pair of us, a nurse enters and administrates medicine to my mother. I then excuse myself to go get the boys from the waiting room. Wouldn't be fair to have them waiting forever. I walk down the long hall and make a right turn and smile softly when I see my best mates. 

“My mumma is just having her meds. Would you lot like to see her?” I speak softly. Louis grins at me and walks over, throwing an arm around my neck. “Of course we'd like to see the lovely lady of the hour.” I smile widely and take his hand in mine.

“Come on then!” I giggle softly and drag him to the room i've just gone out of. Harry and Niall, following close behind us. I open the door once we're in front of it and walk in quietly. My mum smiles up at us. 

“How nice to see you lads. Come give me a cuddle, then.” Harry and Louis doesn't skip a beat. They're right at her side, hugging and kissing her gently. Niall lingers behind, biting his lip, nervously. 

“Go on too...she needs lots of cuddles.” Niall looks at me and nods slowly before making his way on over to her.

“Hell, ma'am. I'm Niall Horan. Heard much about you. It's nice to finally meet you.” My mum laughs softly at him.

“No need to be so formal. I'm Hanna, obviously. Sit, please. Get comfortable.” Niall laughs lightly and sits down. I smile and climb in bed with my Mum. I curl up to her side and kiss her cheek. Thankfully, I'm small enough to fit besides her in bed. I miss cuddle sessions with my mumma. 

We all simply chat for hrs and hrs. And before I know, the visiting hours are over and we're kissing Mum goodbye.

“See you tomorrow. I love you so much.” I say as I hug her tightly. 

“Go on, get some rest, hun. I love you too, sweets.” I nod once and kiss her cheek again. I head out with the boys, feeling a mix of emotions. I was super happy, cause my mum was in my arms all day. But I was sad cause I had to leave her all alone. I frown at that thought. Before I could suggest I stay, Harry is next to my side, draping his long arm around my neck.

'Long day, eh? Lets go get some nice sleep. Don't worry, all she's gonna do now is rest too.” I smile softly and nod at him. I don't know how, be he some how know how I was feeling.

This day was the worst and best day in a long while. But at least it ended well.


	5. And it All Went Down Hill

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Its gna be a little sad...

I woke up feeling off. I didn't exactly now why so I simply shrugged the feeling off and hoped into the shower. I let the hot water hit my back, relaxing my tense muscles and letting yesterday activities slide off me. Last night, when we came back to the hotel, I fell asleep quite quickly. I don't think I even ate. But the boys appeared to have gotten pizza, judging by the empty box and other food rubbish on the floor in the room. I smile as I think back on yesterday. I was feeling very overwhelmed and exhausted from the previous events. As I start washing my hair, I hear the bathroom door open, making me look through the glass door. I smile at the foggy image of a curly headed boy.

“Who's there?” I ask, smiling softly when I hear his groggy voice answer back.

“Mee, I've got to weee.” I laugh lightly at Harry's silly antics and rinse out the conditioner that was sat in my hair. I hear Harry taking a piss, causing me to shrug and frown as I rinse by body off as well. I shut the water off and grab my towel from off the door. I wrap myself in it and step out the shower. Harry smiles at my through the foggy mirror as he washes his hands. “You're looking beautiful as ever.” He teases, playfully. I laugh softly and roll my eyes.

“Shut up.” I say, blushing faintly . Harry laughs loudly when he notices me blushing and starts brushing his teeth. I grin and smack him hard on his butt as I walk out. I receive a small 'eep' from the unexpected movement. I laugh softly and go over to the bag Louis packed for us all. I drop the write cloth that sat around my hips and slip on some boxers. I towel dry my hair as best as possible and walk over to the bed, Louis was asleep on and climb in by him. I kiss his cheek and curl up to his side.

I hate to admit it, but I'm still quite hurt by Niall's wild assumptions yesterday. I just don't get where he came to that conclusion. Is it because of how I express myself? Because I love cuddles? Or because I'm a bit sensitive and get upset easily? I don't know, maybe something is wrong with me. I frown, the thoughts making my head start to hurt. I slip my thumb into my mouth and close my eyes slowly. I sigh softly as I let the world of unconsciousness take over my body.

–

“Zaynie?” I hear a soft voice calling me. I smile lightly and keep sleeping. I felt so relax. Se deep into a cloud of peacefulness. “He's so adorable..but he has to get up, Lou.” I hear a different voice say.

“Zayn! Zayn!” I startle awake, my eyes widen and a small frown etched onto my thin lips. 

“Hey, we gotta get going if we want to make it back home by tonight.” I yawn, just realizing my thumb was still my mouth. I blush faintly letting my hand drop from my face. This habit of mines was being a regular thing. It was starting to make me nervous as I didn't even realize when I had in my mouth until I go to speak. I don't want the boys thinking less of my because of it.

“Okay, I'm up.” I climb off Louis's lap- not knowing how I even got there in the first place, I head to the bag and slide on a pair of jeans and hoodie. Not even bothering to place a shirt under the jacket. 

20 minutes later, we're all piled up in the back of Harry's mustang and making our way to the hospital, where I'd have to say good bye to my mum for at least a couple of months.

When we finally arrive to the hospital we quickly go to the cancer ward and walk don the long hall towards my mother's room. My stomach twists in knots. The looks of yesterday's nurses making me feel uneasy. I frown and reach for Niall's hand.

“Why are they looking at us like that?” I ask quietly, a small whimper sliding out of my mouth against my will. Niall looks at my and smiles lightly.

 

“It's probably nothing, babe. Don't worry bout them.” He reassures me. I nod slowly and go into the room 204. Same as yesterday. I pale at the sight before me. My mother skin looked ghostly gray, sweat all over her body. Her eyes were bloodshot red and she was shaking, even though she was under at least 3 blankets.

I run over quickly. “Mummy?! What's going on?” The nurse near her side gives my a small sad smile. “There's nothing more we can do. I'm sorry. We just have to make her comfortable.” I frown, tears in my eyes as I shake my head.

“No! No! You HAVE to make her all better! Please! You're a doctor.. doctors help people! Please! I..i..i.. cant..!” I cried. Louis and Harry instantly rush to my side as they see me in distress. They both try hushing me and saying soft whispers of things I really cant hear right now.

“Please! Pleasee..!”I begged, crying harder. I didn't know what I was pleading for. For my mum to get better? For the pain to stop? For the nagging burn in chest to stop attacking my aching heart?. Niall came and sat at my feet. He rubs my legs soothingly.

“Zaynie... She wont be in pain anymore. She can finally be freed..and relax..forever.” He tried to comfort, but I was having none of it. I shook my head vigorously and got up, pushing the boys off of me as I did so./

“No! Shut up! All of you! Get out! Get out!!” I yell loudly. Hot tears streamed down my red face. The nurse frowns and exits the boys out, not before telling me to take my time and they understand. I bite down hard on my lip to stop it from wobbling so much. I take a shaky breath and sit down by my gorgeous mother. I taker her hand in mines and kiss it softly.

“Wake up, mumma. Please. Don't go just yet. Talk to me just one last time.” My mother shivered in her deep sleep. I pick up the damp flannel and dab her sweaty forehead with it. I pull the blankets up higher on her and kiss her cheek.

“You don't give up. You're always the strong and brave one. Who's gonna take care of me? I love you so much mummy, you're a warrior.” I lay by her and watch her sleep for hrs. Nurses come and go as I lay with her. Some say stuff to me that I barely hear, as I zone out from all the extra noises. 

She finally woke at 4 PM; despite my earlier wishes the boys make their way into the small room. When she first opens her eyes, she tells the nurse she cant see and it's all bright. I cry quietly at this discover. Soon after, she says it's all blurry, but she can see. It hurts too much for her to talk, so I told her not to speak. I lay there in complete silence, rubbing her hand softly. It's funny, because I knew she was dying. I knew she was going to go away one day. But now that the task is at hand, I cant help but to beg for more time. The only Mum I'll ever have. I sigh at my thoughts and look up at her.

“Do you remember the first time He touched me? Well the 1st time I told you he did? You member what you said? You told me that you failed because you didn't protect me. I had laughed and said you were the only one that got me through it. You didn't even realize how much power you had. Coming home to you everyday after school made me feel okay. Having the occasional sweets for tea, made it okay. Your kisses and hugs. Your stories of your very first loves. Mum, you made everything okay. I love you so so so much. I can see you're in pain. I hope...I hope, me being with you makes this okay for you.” I look at her, seeing a small smile placed on her chapped lips. She squeezes my hand with the little strength in her.

“You..being..here..l..always..” She starts coughing, tears present in her eyes. I rub her hand soothingly, smiling softly at her. “Always makes it okay...I love you. With all...me heart, Zaynie. Good night...and good..m-..morn...ning..for the...-” I could see her struggling to breathe as she tried to carry on with her sentence. Tears rolled down my cheeks.

“Shh. Shhh, mummy.” I whispered softly to her, cupping her cheeks in my hands. She shook her head lightly. She cleared her throat a few times. “good night and good morning for the rest of your days, habibi.” As she finishes, tears pour down my hot cheeks.

“Mu..m..mma..” I see her eyes fall close and her breathing continues to slow. I scream for a nurse as I get off the bed. I needed someone, anyone to help me understand. A woman comes in shortly after and starts assessing my mother. Before I could even question what's going on, a loud beeping fills my ears. Suddenly, doctors and nurses all come in and some are pushing me back. My eyes are blurry from the tears that just wont stop pouring down. I'm taken into someone arms as I scream for them to tell what's happening. Why is that machine beeping. Why. But deep down, I know. I already know. She's dying. She's making her transition to her next life. I see a crash cart being pushed in and hearing the demands of 'clear' and other things I can barely make out.

I'm sat on the floor, my body feeling heavy. Maybe I'm dying too. I don't know how much time has passed. But enough time to know that i'm in Louis's arms. My throat hurts from all the screaming and crying. I look up to see my 3 best friends all looking just a mess. Bloodshot eyes and messy hair. Tear stained cheeks. I see the doctors pushing my mum out and that’s when I finally get out of this trance. I take my heavy feet up from the floor and stall over to the bed. Her lifeless body laid there, thin and almost broken; but strong nonetheless. I take off her necklace that she always wear. 

“Good bye, mum. I hope your next life is just as great but way less painful. The male Dr smiles at me and carefully push the bed down the hall, to the morgue I assume. I look back and the see the boys all sadly looking at me.

“Lets go.” I say, my voice just above a whisper. They nod and get up. We all walk slowly down the quiet halls and out into the fresh evening air. I sigh in relief when the breeze hits my face, making me feel so much calmer. I watch as the boys hop into the car. I stare at them, not really feeling like going back home just yet. So I do the most natural thing to me and run down the street and don't look back not once. Not when I hear Harry yelling my name or when Niall screams in panic. I know Louis will understand. He always understand. That's why when I hear him shout, “Call us when you're ready.”, I'm not surprised. I smile bitterly at that and keep running with all my energy that courses through my veins.

I run for hours and finally stop when I'm at some park. It's really dark out now. I sit at one of the swings and push lightly on it. For it to be a chilly night, I'm sweating like a pig. I shakily pick up my phone and dial Louis's number. “Hello?”

I smile at the softness in his voice. Never have I heard it get as soft as right now. It made me feel warm and safe inside.

“I'm ready. I'm at some park. Just track my GPS. It's too dark for me to figure out where I am.” I hear a soft laugh.

Alright babe. Hang on tight. And don't talk to strangers!” Louis says, light-heartedly. I give an even smaller laugh.

“But it's how we met, Lou lou.” I sniffle. 

“I love you.” I smile into the phone.

“I love you too. I love you too.” I whisper and hang up. Thank God for Louis Tomlinson.


	6. Moving Forth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good things are coming! The next few chapters will be a roller-coaster of discovery.

After a long and eventful weekend, the boys had finally arrived back home. Zayn has barely spoken since the passing of his mother. It's understandable, but everyone is worried that'll shut himself off from the rest of them. He called his grandmother who said she has her will and is handling all of the funeral arrangements. Zayn feels a bit relieved that he doesn't have to handle that all alone. His mother already lost most of her belongings, including her house, which she couldn't no longer pay mortgage on. 

At the funeral Zayn is to pick up whatever is left to him and say goodbye. Not that he is actually ready, but he has to anyway. He has been quite bothered to eat or even drink. All he been feeling like doing is lounging around during the days. He doesn't remember the last time he got a propers' night sleep. He seems to pace the house at night, trying to clear his mind and think of anything besides his mother's lifeless body.

His eldest mate, Louis cant seem to stop worrying 'bout him. He understands hes lost his mum; however, he hopes he'll be okay and mourn healthily. Sometimes he feels a paternal need to protect the slighter younger boy. He seems much younger than 19, though Louis wouldn't dare saying such things to him. He knows that's a sensitive topic for him. He doesn't mind his child like mind. He wouldn't ever make fun of him for something he couldn't quite control. But he hopes he knows why they treat him with such care and caution. It's not just cause they love him, but because he needs it and his statue practically screams young and innocent.  
Louis quietly walks into Zayn's room, thoughts heavy with concern of the raven haired boy. He smiles softly when he notices his friend was asleep. His thumb was half way in his mouth and his not so fluffy brown bear was cuddled close to his chest. He sighs softly. He was happy his friend was finally getting some sleep, but that nerving feeling was still there. Zayn has barely spoken. He has been using his thumb as a form of comfort more often than not. It definitely takes Louis back to the darker days, when Zayn was being bullied and would always take to his thumb for comfort and curl up into himself. No matter where he was or what was happening. If he felt scared, overwhelmed, or hurt, he would simply put his thumb in his mouth and run to a corner and get into fetus position. Of course that only made the kids tease him more. Those warts! 

Louis walks into the room more and climbs into the bed next to his best mate. He sighs softly and places his arm around the younger boy's waist. He knows Harry gets jealous when I come and sleep in here when Zayn finally gets some sleep. But he just want to make sure he gets the best sleep possible and if he wakes from a nightmare, he is right there to help him. He pushes some of the strands of hair out of the tanned boy's face as he watched him sleep. He was so beautiful and peaceful asleep. He sucked lightly on his thumb, breathing softly as he slept. He smiles at him and peck the corner of his mouth. When he pulls away he sees a frowning harry at the door.

“What was that Lou?” He rolls his eyes and closes his eyes.

“A kiss. Come in bed, will yah? Stop being a jealous prick.” He glares at Louis, although it goes unnoticed as Louis had long ago shut his eyes.

“Since when do we kiss other people?” Harry asks, annoyed by the shorter one's actions.

“Fine. Take your bitterness elsewhere. I'm not guilty of any wrong. He looks so peaceful sleeping here. I want him to sleep well.” Louis says, opening his eyes looking down at the boy laid beside him. His thin lips slightly pouting as his thumb had left his mouth some time ago. Louis smiles at the boy and look over at Harry as he feels him climbing in besides him.

“He does look peaceful..hm.” Louis smiles and closes his eyes, curling closer into his boyfriend. “Good night Hazza.”

“Night Louis. Sorry I overreacted.” Louis smiles and nods once.

–  
Louis is woken hours later by soft sniffling. He climbs out of bed and follows the sound as he rubs his eyes and yawns loudly. He sees the light on in the washroom and walks over to the door.

“Zayn? Is that you?” He asks, already knowing the answer. He pushes the door open more and walks in. he frowns at the sight. Zayn was sat with his knees to his chest and his chin rested on one of his knees. His eyes bloodshot from crying, and his nose running. I walk over slowly and sit by him. 

“Wan' talk about it?” He bites his lip and looks at Louis.

“You'll laugh at me..” He mumbles and looks back at the floor.

“Wont. I promise.” He frowns at himself and nods.

“I wet myself.” Louis takes a small breath and nods slowly. He makes sure to choose his next words wisely.

“Did you have a nightmare?” He nods and looks at me. 

“Wanna talk about it?” Louis asks gently, encouragingly almost. Zayn shakes his head instantly. “Wasn't bout my Mum. Something else.”

Louis nods and smirks slightly as curiosity creeps up on him. “Are you hiding something from me? Your best mate!? You ought to be ashamed!” Louis fake gasps and pushes him lightly. Zayn giggles and blushes faintly. He shakes his head rapidly.

“No, no, no.” Louis smiles and pokes his cheek.

“Good cause I tell you everything. So, I gotta tell you..whilst you were asleep, which you look so adorable doing by the way, I gave you a kiss. Haz got a little jealous about it.” He blushes even more.

“Oh like this?” He leans over and pecks Lou's lips. “He doesn't have to be jealous! Everyone gets kisses like that. I kiss Niall a bunch of times like that. I'll even give him a kiss so he wont feel sad!” Louis laughs at Zayn's simple logic.

“Come on, lets go back to bed, baby. It's late..or early.” Louis stands up and extends his hand out for Zayn to take. He takes it, blushing faintly as he stands up. “I like being called baby..” He says so softly that Louis barely hears him. Louis grins and walks back to bed with him.

'I'll be calling him that more often then.' Louis thinks to himself.  
–  
Another week passes by, nothing seems to have change from the previous week. Zayn was talking more but barely eating. He was sleeping a bit more, but seemed to be having nightmares more frequent.

Then a third week passes by and that's when things really changed. He is currently standing in an ill-fitted black suit amongst many faces he has never seen in his life. One after another come and give him their condolences. Saying sorry for something they hadn't caused. He wishes they wouldn't. Seemed like a behaviour that was so extra. Besides, she's in a much better place now. No more pain or anything.

When his grandmother arrives, everyone makes their way to the cemetery. Small words were mentioned and shared about the deceased and then everyone was looking at the raven haired boy. Expecting him to say some long speech that he prepared for his mum. Only he hadn't prepared one. He looks around and feels utterly confused. Funerals had always been the one thing his mind didn't quite grasp. People who barely knew his mother were crying. He understands that the nurses wanted to save her and they couldn't. But everyone else seemed melodramatic. Who even invited them? He sighs heavily and clears his throat.

“My mother was a woman of many words. She use to run my ear off about what's wrong with the world and how much spices to properly put for her good chicken. I still can't cook great chicken. She was a great person. Always was there for me. Even when she wasn't, she was. She was a perfectionist and would always make people smile. She hated violence and anger. She said its a disease that plagues one area and the rest follows shortly after, killing each piece, one by one. Kind of like cancer, I suppose. If she's up there watching down, as they say, then I'm sure she's laughing. She fucking hated arrangements like this. Funerals. The fake tears and overused condolences. Most of you people never even met her before. She would hate to see such a fake score. She would of loved for Lou and I to start a bit of ruckus. For Harry to turn up the music and ask 'where is the special lady?'. I don't need to grieve any more. It's time to celebrate an amazing, wonderful, almost superhuman women named Hanna Mari Malik. You made it to 54 mum. I love you. Go kick off your heels and celebrate as you always would.” He smiles softly as he closes his small speech. Thinking of his mother didn't make him sad any more. It made him happy, because she was love. So much love. It made him feel happy and warm. He was done crying. He cried for a month. He looks up and sees a lot of shocked faces, but also a few proud ones. He looked at the priest and chuckled at the irony of his presence. His mother wasn't religious. Definitely far from being catholic. 

“Bury my mum, sir. She would of wanted to have been buried ages ago.”

He looks over at his best friend, Louis and sees him smiling at him. He smirks and raises an eyebrow. Challenging him quietly to make a bit of fun of this all. Harry and Niall are giving slightly worried looks as they watch the exchange between the two. Zayn grins and picks up a bunch of flowers and pours them into the empty grave. “Look! A bed of flowers!” Louis burst out laughing at my not so funny joke. Zayn starts laughing and starts running off. “Lets get some food! I'm starving!”

“Well, not as much as those corpses!” Louis is cackling behind him as he catches up with Zayn. Harry and Niall aren't so far off. Zayn smiles at himself. This is what she would of wanted. All of the boys smiling and doing stupid stuff for the laughs.

A few days later, the boys all gathered around for lunch. They were eating pizza and chatting about random stuff. Zayn had been feeling more happier and calmer.

“When was the last time you've been laid Niall?” he groans and shrugs as he stuffs a piece of pizza in his mouth. 

“Not everyone is like the pair of you. Cant be shagging every free moment of our day. Zayn laughs at him and raises an eyebrow.

“So how long is that then? I'm guessing quite long since you changed the question and all.” He smirks at him. Louis laughs loudly

Niall rolls his eye and grins, “A few months.” Harry laughs lightly . “Woo, I have to have some weekly or id have blue balls!” Louis smacks him in the groin.

“Not every week!” He groans, pushing Louis off him. “Not the week of your mother's death or when Harry had pneumonia. NOT. EVERY. WEEK.” Niall and Zayn burst out laughing as Harry turns beet red.

“Idiots.” Niall grins and looks at Zayn.

“What about yourself? When was your last time?” Zayn frowns at the thought of his uncle touching him. He shudders. “I'm actually asexual. Last time I probably had a wank was last year.” Niall stares at Zayn. Shock clearly evident on his face. 

“Really? I had no idea...So you're a virgin then?” He frowns even more and look at Harry and Louis for support. Louis gives Zayn and subtle nod as if he's saying it's okay. Harry gives him a small reassuring smile. And because he feels safe and trusts them, he tells Niall the truth.

“I am not. I was raped. When I was 8. By my uncle.” he says slowly. And gives Niall a small smile. “But that's in the past. Just me and my hand if I feel like it.” He stares at Zayn observingly.

“Are you sure you're asexual? I mean..sometimes when traumatic events take place we are turned off or appalled by certain things. I know these two are different, but when I was assaulted a few years back, I couldn't stand the smell of old spice or the way leather felt against my skin because of what my brain associated it with., My therapist said its how our brain copes sometimes. Saying , 'this is dangerous'.” Zayn smiles softly at him, Happy he shared, although he didn't have to.

“Thanks for that Niall. But as of right now, asexuality is what feels right to me.” Niall grins and nods. 

“Sweet! So lets go play some Fifa.” Zayn laughs at his casualness and nod.

“Lets do that.” He grins and offers Zayn his hand as they get up. He looks back at harry and Louis who were cleaning up and putting up the leftovers. Zayn smiles to himself and follows Niall into the living room.

Never did he think he would feel so happy to have three amazingly supportive best friends. What more could he ask for?


	7. Secrets Revealed

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The new interactions between Louis and Zayn raises suspicion. Harry decides to investigate and is shocked at the new discovery.

It's been weeks and everything is slowly turning back to normal. Well, sort of. Zayn seems to be impossibly clingy to Louis. Which of course, Harry has notice. He knows they've gotten closer since his mothers' passing. And he is okay with that. But of course, he'd like to have some time alone with just him and his boyfriend. He sometimes feels like Louis is dating Zayn instead of him.

Currently, Zayn and Louis are sitting at the dining room table. Harry stares observingly at Zayn and Louis from the living room. Zayn is sat on Lou's lap; being cradled as if he is a baby. Zayn's thumb is dangerously close to his mouth and a nice smile is present on his pink lips. Louis is whispering something to him. The dark haired boy eyes widen with excitement as Louis rubs his hand up and down Zayn's side. Zayn starts giggling and Louis laughs softly as he leans down and kiss Zayn's nose. Harry frowns at the scene before him. 'What the hell is going on here? The pair of them? I mean, Louis wouldn't dare. But..would he?' Harry thinks as his cold eyes stare deep at them.

“Alright?” Harry asks as he walks in and sits besides the two. Louis looks up and smiles softly at his loving boyfriend.

“Just fine, babe. What's up?” He shrugs in response.

“Just came to see what you lads were up to. By the looks of it, not much. Just cuddling..” Louis looks at him, curiously. He nods slowly and then looks at Zayn, who is now sucking his thumb. Louis tsks at the action and takes his hand away from his mouth. He leans down and whispers something to him, yet again. Louis doesn't mean to be rude, but there's some things he can't say out loud. The words that are whispered are far too quiet for Harry to hear, so he rolls his eyes and gets up. He leaves and goes up into his bed room. He does the only logical thing in his mind, he calls Niall.

After three rings, Niall finally answers.

“Took you long enough.” Harry says, impatiently. Niall laughs at Harry's bitter mood. “Oooh, someone is not having a good day. What can I do for you, mate?”

Harry sighs and sits down on his bed. “Did you notice anything weird or well, different with Zayn and Lou?” Niall stays quiet for a minute as he thinks and gathers his thoughts.

“Yeah, the other day we were watching telly and Louis got up to go to the toilet and guy looked liked he wanted to follow him in there. He was about to cry. Louis leaned over and whispered something to him and that seemed to have made him feel better. He lit up like a fucking lava lamp. He was just peachy after that. I don't know whats happening man.” Harry frowns at the new information.

“What the..I mean, is he still grieving? He seemed to be better.” Niall sighs.

“Well, this is Zayn. He never tells us anything unless we make him.” Harry frowns. Just then, he hears the two coming up from downstairs and entering Zayn's bedroom. Harry frowns.

“They're going to bed together.” Harry frowns, feeling defeated. “Are you sure they're not cheating?”Niall laughs loudly.

“No! Of course not! But if you go in there in 10 minutes and they're doing what Louis called friendly kisses, then yeah. But if they're asleep, then just talk to him. Stop being a prick. He loves you. Come on.” Harry sighs and nods once.

“Right, I'll talk later. Bye.” He hangs up and sighs heavily as he lays back on his bed. What was he to do? He couldn't possibly imagine his life without Louis as his boyfriend. He always seen them as the two to get married. Zayn never seemed jealous or angry of their relationship. He was always cuddly with the pair of them. He groans loudly.

“This is stupid. They wouldn't betray me like that. They both love me way to much to blatantly rub their cheating relationship in my face.” Harry says to himself. With those final thoughts, he gets up and walks down the hall quietly. He takes a few deep breaths and slowly opens Zayn's door. He lets out a small gasp. To say what was before him shocked him was an understatement. He blinks quickly a few times and walks in a little more. Zayn is curled up with his old brown teddy bear. His long black hair splayed across his small forehead as he appears to sleep. But that's not what shocks Harry. Harry stares hard at the small dummy thats bobbing under his nose as he hears Louis singing a soft lullaby to the slightly younger one. He stares in shock and confusion at the scene before him. He averts his attention from Zayn and to Louis. He was laying on his side, his left arm propped under his head as he rub Zayn's belly slowly. The whole interaction seemed almost natural to him. Harry frowns at this. He shakes himself out of his previous state of shock and walks all the way in the room.

“What's going on?” He questions. Louis startles at the sound of his boyfriend's voice. He looks over at him, anger running through his veins.

“Get out.” he says through gritted teeth. Harry looks taken aback from the sudden change in demeanor. He scoffs,”Excuse me?” Louis growls at him and gets off the bed. He pulls the blanket over Zayn and kisses his head gently.

“Good night, baby.” He whispers. Harry stares at him, confused. His emotions seemingly all over the place. Louis turns on the night light and looks at harry.

“Just go. Don't say another word.” Harry frowns but does what he says anyway. He walks out into the hall, Louis following behind him. He shuts the door and looks at the curly lad.

“Go to our room. I'll be just there.” Harry sighs, annoyed but follows his order anyway. He sits on the bed as he waits for his boyfriend. He was too confused to even try to comprehend what he just seen. Zayn was using a baby item. Louis was singing to him. Maybe something was wrong with Zayn mentally and he only just noticed it.

Meanwhile, Louis was standing near Zayn's bedroom as he calmed himself down. It was all too soon. Harry wasn't suppose to find out yet. Not until Zayn was completely ready and confident in himself.

**Two weeks earlier**

“Zaynie boy!” Louis called out. “Harrys' gone out to get some supper. He yells as he searches the house for the dark haired boy. He was just near but he seemed to have disappear quite quickly. Louis frowns and goes into Zayn's room. He gasps at what he sees. Zayn is a sniffling mess. He's taking off his trousers and pants that are clearly soaked. He has his bear in one arm and something in his mouth. Louis can see from where he is standing. Zayn's back is to Louis. He gets a towel and turns around. Louis eyes widen at what is happening before him. In his mouth, held a small baby blue binky. Louis heart instantly softens. He felt that old paternal feeling come back. He walks into the room completely and shits the door behind himself.

“Zaynie..” he says softly, almost cautiously. He looks up at Louis, eyes all red as he fists at them furiously.

“I was just going for a wee..but...b..b..but.. I did..didn't make it.” He hiccuped, the binky falling out of his mouth. Louis holds himself back from cooing over the sight.

“Its alright baby. We all make accidents sometimes. Lets get you cleaned up, yeah?” He nods and takes the hand Louis offers him. They walk into the toilet and Louis draws him a bath. “Lets get your shirt off too.” Zayn nods and raises his arms. Louis pulls off his shirt, making his hair stick up on his head. He slides his thumb in his mouth as he sits on the toilet seat. Louis sort of understands what's happening. He is into a form of age play and he is currently a little. He knows they are much more vulnerable when they are in the head space of one. So he knows he must be careful and soft with him. He checks the water temperature and declares it all okay. He shuts off the faucet and helps the raven headed boy into the bath. “We can get you all washed up and get you some milk, yeah? Maybe have a bit of a cuddle.”He smiles lightly and nods.

 

“Yeah! I love cuddles!” He chuckles lightly. His voice was a few octaves lower than usual. He sounded completely adorable and looked it too. Louis quickly washes him up, not finding anything weird about it. You see he has done research on age play in the past. He wondered if it would help him and be good for him. And now here they were. He feels stupid that he didn't notice the signs earlier. Zayn has always been the perfect little. It was almost obviously so.

 

Louis rinses him off and grabs a towel. “Come on, stand up.” he instructs the smaller boy. He does as Louis says and he is then wrapped into the red towel. Louis takes him to the room and picks up the bear off the floor. Zayn sits on the bed and holds his bear close to his partially wet body. Louis goes over to the dressers and get some sweats out and a pair of boxers. When he is satisfied with the clothing choices, he walks back over to the boy. He helps him dry off. Zayn had placed the binky back in his mouth. Louis grinned at the sight of him. As Louis dresses him, Zayn starts to whine a bit for Louis to hold him. Just by his demeanor, Louis could tell that he was getting sleepy. Once he was fully dressed, Louis lays him in bed and climbs in besides him. Zayn looks up at him with wide innocent eyes. They looked full of curiosity. Louis smiles widely at the younger one under him. He didn't know how to handle this. Zayn was already so pure as an adult, so seeing him as a little made his heart swell with so much love. It was such a different level of love. “I love you baby.” Louis says as he cuddles the boy. Zayn's eyes start to flutter close. Louis watches him and starts to softly sing.

 

_“Sleep, baby, sleep_   
_Your father tends the sheep_   
_Your mother shakes the dreamland tree_   
_And from it falls sweet dreams for thee_   
_Sleep, baby, sleep_   
_Sleep, baby, sleep.“_

 

Louis couldn't explain why his chest hurt from all the love Or why butterflies flew freely in his stomach. He felt utterly and completely connected with Zayn in the moment. His body instantly craved the need to protect him. And that's what he decided. He would take care of Zayn and protect him from everything.

..

Louis walks into their room and closes the door. He sees harry sat their with a lank face. Louis understands that he is probably confused and slightly alarmed. But he vowed to himself and little Zayn that he'd protect him not matter what. He is allowed to let go as much as he needs when he is with him. The last few weeks felt nothing but right. He wasn't going to let Harry or anyone take that away from them. I Louis needed this just as much as Zayn did. He walks over and sits on the bed. The contact of the mattress to his body made him instantly relax. Letting some of the stress of him as he lays back. He sighs heavily. “He's vulnerable, you know? I really didn't want you to hurt him. That's why I got angry.” Harry looks at Louis and nods slowly as he sits up.

“I don't get it. I'm really confused to what's going on between the pair of you. And well, if something is wrong with him...mentally.” Louis scowls at him.

“Nothing is wrong with him!He's just perfect as he is. So you better not say so again!” Louis seethes. Harry frowns and folds his arms.

“You're being delusional. No? He needs to go see a therapist. He just lost his mother three months ago. He's now acting like a baby and clinging to his best mate as if he was his mother. He is 19 years old! That's not normal!” Louis practically could feel his blood boiling in his body. It took everything for him not to slap the curly lad before him.

“You're just so, so stupid! He's being doing this for over a year and has been hiding it from us all. It's called age play. Look it up. He has only be better since he's been able t fully regress round me. You cant say anything like this in front of him. . I'm taking care of him.”

Harry lets out a wild manic laugh. “Do you hear yourself? He is not okay!!” Suddenly, harry is storming out of the room and down the hall. Louis runs after him quickly, hoping he wouldn't disturb Zayn. Unfortunately that exactly was Harry's plans. He was in Zayn's room, staring at the boy coldly. Louis frowns at him.

“Leave him alone! He doesn't deserve any shit from you! He is mines to care for!” Louis whisper-yells. Harry lets out another roaring laugh and shakes his head. “No, Louis. He isn't a baby or a pet. He is a grown man. He needs to see help.” He walks over to Zayn and snatches the dummy out of his mouth. The action makes Zayn instantly stir and whine in his sleep. Louis walks over and takes it from Harry.

“Get. Out.” he says through gritted teeth. He groans.

“Look at him, Lou. LOOK AT HIM! He is 19 years old. Not two. Not three. He is an adult. He can drink and go to pubs. He can get laid if he chooses to. He needs to go see a therapist!” Both boys didn't notice Zayn was away until they heard his soft sniffles. Louis looks over at the previously sleeping boy and frowns when he sees he is crying. He is biting hard on his lip and is trembling slightly. The sight breaks Louis's heart. He looks at Harry, anger written clearly all over his face. He had enough.

“You ass hole! Get-” He slaps him hard across the face. “get the fuck out of the house! I don't care where you go, just get out!” Louis yells loudly. Zayn shrinks into himself, crying harder as he hears them fight.

Harry stares at Louis, feeling extremely hurt by his boyfriend's actions.

“Did you just slap me?” Louis groans and pushes him out of the room. He slams the door in his face and locks it. He instantly goes over to Zayn and pulls him into his lap. He rocks him gently, whispering soothing words to him.

“Shh, its okay baby. Its all okay. He just doesn't know what he's talking about. Come on, yeah? Told you I'd protect you. I got you, love. I got you.”

Louis knows harry doesn't understand and needs time to process the new information. But he refuses to let Harry anywhere near Zayn again, unless he is apologizing and completely accepts him for everything that is. Zayn is now Louis's first priority. If Harry couldn't understand that, then maybe they are better off not together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lots of things happened. Zayn ends up trusting Louis more than Niall, as oppose to the beginning where he reckoned he'd tell Niall about the age play first. What do you think Harry is going to do now that he has been kicked out? Do you suppose Zayn wont regress any more or quite the opposite now that it's only Louis and him? let me know your thoughts!


	8. DADDY!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you all for being super patient with me! I'm sorry i was gone for so long. But don't you worry, ill have two chapters up each week of July, so that should be fun!

Its been nearly 18 hours since everything has happened. Harry had quickly left and gone to Niall's house. They were currently sat at the table, having lunch together. Niall was confused to what had happened and wasn't able to get any proper info from harry, thus far.

“Harry, you gonna tell me what went down? Think I've waited long enough...” Harry sighs loudly. He knew he'd have to tell him eventually. Especially after the phone call they had. He runs a hand through his messy curly brown hair and looks at his slightly agitated friend.

“Louis..isn't cheating. We had a disagreement over Zayn needing therapy. He went berserk. They're doing this thing.. I cant tell you what it is, cause Louis would kill me. But, he slapped me when I tried to help him see that we have to help Zayn before he goes too far down and he just went supper possessive and kicked me out.” Niall frowns and stares at his friend. He was confused and didn't really understand what went down. But he knew one thing and that is Harry and Louis are meant to be together and Zayn is his best mate. So of course he was thinking already of how to fix this.

“Okay, how about this. I go over and see what's happening and you stay here. Lay low for awhile. And ill try to talk to Louis and see what's actually happening in their minds.” Harry agrees to his plan as any plan was better than none. He sighs and gets up and empties his plate out in the sink.

Niall took that as a cue to get going now. He wasn't going to see his friend sulking all day over a perhaps simple argument. He gets up and puts on his jumper and shoes.

“Alright, try not to be too happy while I'm gone.” Niall jokes as he picks up his keys. Harry gives a small smile and shrugs as he heads out of the kitchen. Niall groans internally and quickly exits the house. He walks over to his BMW and gets in and drives away. 

As he drives down the familiar streets he cant help but wonder how different the dynamics would be if Harry and Louis broke up. How sad Zayn would feel as they're his rocks. To say Niall is not nervous about visiting the guys would be a lie. Harry seems to be in a right mess after what happened with them. He seems quite confused and that's shocking for me as he is usually the most understanding of us all. 

20 minutes later, Niall is pulling up in the parkway and getting out of the car. He takes exactly 12 steps to the door and knock twice before he finally lets out a deep breath. Inhale. Exhale. His nerves swarm through my body as he waits for the door to open up. It seems to take forever; when in reality its probably less than 30 secs that hes been stood here.

Finally, the door opens up and Zayn is first to come to the door. He grins at the Irish lad. “Niall!” he shouts as throws his arms around the blond, instantly making Niall less nervous. He smiles softly at the darker haired boy.

“Hey man, what's up?” He closes the door behind them and shrugs. 

“Louis and I are making cupcakes!” He says over excitedly.

“You seem to be in a really good mood.” He grins and nods.

“Yeah! Of course! We're making cupcakes!” Niall laughs at that.

“Are you high?” He asks, wondering why he was acting on a buzz. Louis then comes in and clears his throat.

“Zayn, baby, go get a bowl out and measuring cups so we can start the frosting, yeah?” Zayn nods quickly and runs out the room. Niall laughs as he continues watch him. He was a bit confused to him being super energetic and happy over something as simple as cupcakes.

“Did you give him weed?” Niall asks Louis. Knowing the weed makes him act a little funny. Louis sighs and runs a hand through his hair.

“No, I didn't. What's so wrong with a happy Zayn?” Niall shrugs.

“Nothing, he just seems a bit off.” Louis laughs coldly.

“Did harry send you?Because if he then you and him both can just-” Niall cuts him off.

“No, no, I suggested I come around. Hazza seemed pretty shook up. I don't know what really happened but I'd like to know because he seems so upset and hurt. Even confused. He says Zayn needs therapy and you guys disagreed and you were acting possessive and slapped him.” He says quickly. “ oh and then threw him out.” Louis laughs and shakes his head.

“That idiot! He did forget to mention how he made my bay boy-, I mean Zayn, cry. He doesn't need therapy or want it. Now you need to leave or shut up about this.” Niall frowns at his tone. He was still confused but decided to stay to better understand what's happening. He was really confused by the new nickname 'baby boy'.

“Alright let me help bake.” Niall suggests quietly. Louis pauses for a moment before he finally nods and walks into he kitchen. Louis smiles softly at Zayn. He was sat quietly staring at the cupcakes baking in the oven. He walks over and tickles his sides, causing the raven haired boy the break out into laughter as he pushes Louis's hands off him.

“Stop, lou-lou!” Niall smiles at the scene before. He looks down and bites his lip as he thoughts took him away from everything. He felt like he wasn't intruding on something private and intimate. That thought alone made him sad, because why should his best mates have intimate moments together and he not be included? He could see why harry was feeling jealous and left out. The pair seem rather close now. Not that they weren't before. Just even closer.

“Come on babe, off the floor. Lets wash our hands so we can make some frosting!” Louis says sweetly to the slightly younger boy. Zayn grins and gets up and washes his hands besides Louis. Niall stands back, watching from afar.

“Are you baking with us, Ni?” Zayn asks, his voice extremely soft. Niall nearly melts at the softer voice. 

“Oh no thanks. I'll like to watch these two fine bakers right now.” Zayn giggles and nods as he dries his hands on the tea towel. 

Niall helps the pair out by getting the icing sugar and shortening out of the cupboards. Louis then gets vanilla and lemon extract out.

“Hm, zaynie, what colour should our frosting be?” Zayn's eyes light up at Louis's question.

“BLUE! Like your eyes!” He shouts. Louis laughs, blushing faintly.

“Oh my eyes? Why not blue like the sky. Or blue like your blanket...?”

Zayn grins at him, “Because blue always remind me of wou.” Niall raises an eyebrow at them. Did he really just say 'wou' instead of 'you'?   
“Oh gosh babe, you have me blushing.” louis states as he starts pouring the icing sugar into a cup. Niall laughs lightly.

“What is going on with you two?” Louis looks at him, giving him a slight glare and look that says to shut up. Zayn pours the cup into the bowl as Louis measures out the shortening next.

“What you mean, Niall?” Zayn questions. Niall shakes his head, letting it go for Louis's sake and his own. 

They continue to bake, both making occasional cute comments until the frosting has completely finished and the cupcakes taken out. Once the cupcakes cooled, Louis then goes on to teach Zayn how to frost like a 'professional'.

“This is how you do it baby.” He says as he picks up the pipping bag and presses the frosting out as he turns the mini cake in a circle as he pipes. Zayn looks on as if this was the most serious task he's been given yet. 

“Just like that. Your turn.” Louis says as he hands him the bag. With shaky fingers, the dark haired boy takes the bag and places a cake in front him. He pokes out his little tongue as he attempts to do just what Louis did. Only his comes out a little less clean than the older lad.

“Does this look good, Lou-lou?” Louis beams at him, grinning widely.

“It looks perfect baby!” Zayn giggles and claps.

“Yay!” he cheers. Niall laughs at him. He didn't understand what was happening but loved seeing the cute softer side of Zayn. Even though Zayn was already a generally soft person. Maybe he just needed some extra care right now. They all continue to frost the rest of the cupcakes. Niall even joins in and frosts a few. Afterwards, Louis and Niall both clean up the kitchen while zayn continued to bounce off his feet.

“Hey dad-Louis...can I um, have a cupcake now..?” Zayn asks, his voice gone quiet near the end of his question. Niall frowns at him. Was he about to call Louis DADDY? Oh hell no! 

“Zayn, were you just about to call Lou, daddy?” Niall asks rather cautiously. Although he didn't know why he was being apprehensive. 

Zayn's looks at Niall with a deep blush on his face. He the looks at Louis who was also blushing but for different reasons. After a short minute of silence, Louis finally speaks.

“Yes you may have a one. Eat in the dining room. Just don't make a mess, yeah?” Zayn bites his lip and shakes his head. He walks over and whispers something to Louis. Louis smiles softly at the boy. He kisses his cheek gently and rubs his back.

“I'm here, remember? I got you, baby boy.” Zayn blushes again and looks down. He nods slowly and kisses Louis's cheek. Louis smiles softly at him.

“Now, have one of those cupcakes and tell me how wonderful they taste!” Zayn grins and nods as he takes a cupcake. He skips out of the kitchen and into the dining room. Once he is our of sight, Niall quickly questions Louis.

“Okay so what the hell is going on!?” Louis glares hard at him.

“First of all, shut up! Lower your voice. 2Nd of all, don't you dare insult him in anyway. I will not hesitate to send your ass flying our of here.” Niall laughs lightly as he recognizes the possessiveness that Harry had previously mentioned. Louis sighs heavily and leans against the counter.

“He's happy. So happy. He's in a really good place right now. He is into a thing called age play. And right now he is currently in a smaller head space where he is a little. I'm surprised he relaxed so easily around you. He didn't completely let go though. That's why he understood your tone when you questioned him..That was his first time. The first time he's called me that.” He pauses, smiling to himself at that realization. He was so glad Zayn bonded with him and instantly took to him as a caregiver. 

“I love him and this is what he needs. He has been doing this for over a year and has been hiding it from us all. I fount out accidentally. He was in a little state of mind and was in a right mess. He barely thought twice when I asked him if he was alright. He just trusted me to help him in the situation. The next day he thanked me, saying it was the best sleep he got in weeks. He needs this and has my support 100%. You and harry have to get on board because he needs you too. If not, then I don't know what the future holds for the rest of us. This s just how it's going to be for now on.” 

Niall takes a deep breath as he took in all of the new information from his mate. He was far from a bigot but this was a topic he knew next to nothing about. He couldn't see why acting like a baby could help anyone, but he did notice that Zayn was quite happy and less agitated today. If he was to support Zayn and Louis he would have to do some research.

“Okay. Alright. I'll talk to harry and we will research and everything and see how we can try to understand a bit more.” Louis smiles softly at Niall. He felt relived that Niall was willing to try. That's all he could hope for from them.

“Perfect.” just then a very messy Zayn walks into the kitchen. 

“I made a bit of mess.” he says softly. Louis laughs.

“It's alright. Just not on the floor, yeah?” He blushes and shrugs. Louis gives him a stern look.

“Zayn...” Zayn gasps and speaks fast.

“I really didn't mean to! It just fell and my hands got sticky and..and.. don't be mad at me!” Louis sighs and beckons him over.

“Alright, its okay. Lets wash up and see what kind of mess we've got to clean it then.”He walks over to him and lets Louis wash his hands and face. 

“Thank you, daddy.” he says so quietly that Niall almost didn't catch it. Louis grins.

“You're very welcome, baby boy.”


	9. Healing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry they've been short and lousy. My mind is everyone. Enjoy please! And leave feedback! Suggestions and comments are always welcomed.

Its been a couple of days since Niall's visit to Louis's place. Harry and Niall both have took it upon themselves to do some research and look into ageplay. They even decided to make a pros and cons list, thanks to Harry's suggestion. Today they thought it would be smart to see a therapist and see what their take on ageplay was and if they thought therapy was a better option. 

“Niall Horan?” Harry hears an older yet young voice call out in the quiet waiting room. Both boys look up at the figure and smile. They get up and start walking forward. 

“That's us.” Niall answers. The doctor stares at them a bit confused.

“Oh, I thought this was a private session, not a couples session.” The doctor says, causing Niall to burst out in laughter.

“Oh nooo, we're not dating. Its just between us three.” The Doctor smiles gently.

“Okay. I'm sorry if I offended. I'm Dr. Payne and I'll be doing your consultation today. Come with me.” Harry giggles as they follow him into another room. 

“This is so funny.” Harry whispers to Niall. Niall shakes his head, a smirk present on his lips. They both take a sit on the couch as Dr. Payne shuts the door. 

“Alright lads, what can I help you with?” Harry looks over at Niall who simply shrugs. 

“Uh, we have a friend whose mother just passed and he is in a bit of a rough patch. Understandably so. However, he is participating in an activity that's quite strange to us and its crazy that our friend is also supporting him in the act. His demeanor has changed as well and is acting a bit possessive.”” The Dr nods slowly as he observes what Niall says.

“I cant evaluate your your friend without them being her, in my presences what are your friends doing?” 

Harry sighs, “Okay, um they can it ageplay.” Payne smiles at the revelation.

“Ahh. The middle zone. So are you two here to learn about the benefits of ageplay and the good it can offer for mental health ?” Niall's jaw drops open. What?

“What do you mean, the good?You mean it doesn't cause problems with the mind with the whole age regression?” Dr. Payne smiles at Niall and shakes his head slowly.

“Ive seen it do wonders for many of my pass clients. You say your friend has been having a rough time and he and your other mate has found a solution to help him handle it. So ask yourself this, how has your friend been since the change? Have he been nicer to any or you? More relaxed? Does he seem to sleep through the night and have more energy through out the day? Is he putting on or losing weight? If your other friend is supporting him and there seems to be no real harm done then why aren't you two supporting him as well?” Niall and harry ponders over what the doctor just said. 

Harry frowns at himself. Was he really being this self fish simply because he was weirded out? Sure Zee had been stealing his boyfriend from him. But only because that was his only support system. It was obvious to them all that he was more happy over the last few weeks. Harry sighs heavily.

“Damn.” Niall nods in agreement, feeling similar emotions as his curly headed friend.

“We were being such dicks that we hadn't even thought about how he must be feeling through this all.” Niall says, frowning at himself. He felt utterly ashamed of his actions. Dr. Payne smiles at the pair, happy to see he has help them realize that its all okay.

“Well gentleman, that's all for today. Thanks for stopping by. If you ever need anymore help, please, don't hesitate to call me.” The doctor says as he hands each boys a business card. They thank him and quickly exit out the car. Once they get into the car and Niall is driving off, Harry dials Louis's number.

After 5 long rings, Louis is answering the phone nearly screaming a hello into the phone. “Are you apologizing finally, Styles?” Louis asks, a smirk present on his face. Harry laughs at him and runs a hand through his curly locks. 

“Yes, Tomlinson. I'm bearing apologies. Lets have lunch today. Niall and I are ready to talk to the pair of you.” Louis hesitates at the proposal. He has to put Zayn first. Even though he is ready to forgive, he doesn't know how Zayn will feel about the arrangement.

“Alright. Okay, um, sure. Lets do pizza and wings.” Harry grins widely.

“Alright. See you at 2.” Harry hangs up and grins at Niall.

“We're getting pizza with the lads. I'm so excited to see him again..both of them really.” Niall smiles at him as he keep driving.

“Great! I cant wait for you to see younger Zayn. He is so cute and adorable. Hard to resist that's for sure.” Harry smiles and nods once. He sighs quietly to himself as his thoughts start going back to the reason they got in this place in the first place.

“I'm a bit worried, if I'm honest. I don't know what it'll be like to see younger Zayn again. I don't want to just get jealous again of them two. He loves Louis sooo much. Even more than before and that makes me nervous. Especially now that they have this new thing to bond over. And I'm not first to Louis anymore.” Niall nods, understanding.

“Well, Louis loves you a crap load still. Don't forget that. Anyway, little Zee will steal our hearts too. In no time, really.” Harry laughs, seeing how that is true. He gets out of the car once Niall Parks at the Pizzeria . 

“I guess its now or never.” Niall and harry walk into the little place and take a booth in the far back as they wait for their best mates arrival.

Meanwhile, Louis was having a deep conversation with Zayn. Well, he was trying to.

“Zee, listen to me babe. We're going out to have lunch with Niall and Harry. And you gotta be a big boy for me.” The younger boy grins and claps his hands.

“Yay! We get pizza?” Louis smiles at the little.

“Yes, pizza and wings. But did you hear what I said?” he nods immediately. 

“We have lunch and see Hazza and Ni ni!” 

“Yes, good job baby. But what else do you need to do?” He pauses as he thinks about what Louis previously said.

“We get pizza!” Louis laughs softly.

“Yes, and you're going to be a very good boy for daddy, yeah?” He nods rapidly.

“I be a very very very good boy!!” Louis kisses his cheek.

“Yes, so that means you'll be big at lunch, okay?” He pouts and whines as he rubs his sleepy eyes.

“No wike being big!” Louis hugs him and helps him get into his jacket.

“I know, but its just for a little and then we'll go and get you some toys. But only if you're a good little boy!” Zayn giggles and claps, excitedly.

“Yes! I'm always good! We get new toys!!” Luis laughs and gets his wallet and keys. He takes the smaller hand and walks outside with him. He locks the door and go to his old 1998 Toyota. He puts Zayn in the back and buckles him up.

“You've got to sit in the back babe, it's safer.” Zayn simply ignores him as he closes his eyes and puts his thumb in his mouth. Louis tsks and takes out the white and green binky from his pocket. He removes his thumb and puts in the binky.

“Sucking your thumb is dirty. Okay, bub?” Zayn whines slightly and sucks his pacifier. Louis gets in and starts driving to the pizzeria. He sighs heavily as his worries and thoughts consume him. He was hoping for much goodness from the meeting with the boys. If they couldn't accept Zayn for who he was, all of their relations would suffer. He sighs and listens to the soft hum of the radio. They arrive to the pizzeria less than 10 minutes later. Louis parks and looks back at his little. He smiles softly at the sleeping form, but then it was replaced with a frown. If he woke up as a little, he would no doubt be cranky from having no lunch and no nap. But if he was bigger, it would just be easier overall. Sure, he would be stubborn, but they would be able to deal with the problems a lot easier. He sighs and gets out. He opens Zayn's door and shakes him a few times.

“Babe, time to wake up. We're at Lunch now.” Louis say softly as he strokes his cheek. Zayn stirs and pouts slightly before opening his eyes.

“Lets go see Haz and Ni!” Louis takes out the binky and place it in his pocket.

“Yay.” Zayn says unenthusiastically. Louis frowns at him. Just by looking at the raven haired boy he could tell he was worried.

“You're big now?” Zayn nods once and rubs his eyes sleepily.

“You're worried, huh? You don't have to be hun, I got you remember?” His bottom lip wobbles and he throws his arms around him.

“But buh, what if they don't wike me anymowre? Then I have no one to pway with!” Louis smiles at his Little's dilemma. 

“They'll still like you! And if they don't, then I'll play with you and we will find you new friends!” Louis reassures him. It seems to do because Zayn smiles and nods once.

 

“Come on lets go get some pizza!” Louis says as he takes Zayn's hand. They walk inside the little restaurant and look around for the guys. Once they're spotted they go over to join them.

“Hey guys!” Niall says excitedly. Louis waves at him, Zayn simply lingers behind Louis, looking down at the ground.

“Hey Lou...how are you?” Harry says awkwardly. Louis shrugs, looking at his lovely boyfriend. He groans internally. He missed him so much.

“Alright, yourself?” harry nods and scoots over to make room.

“I'm alright too. Ha..i feel like we're getting divorced and we're fighting over who gets custody of the kids.” Louis smirks at his boyfriend's lame joke. Niall, however, bursts out laughing, turning bright red as a result. Zayn rolls his eyes and sits down alongside Louis.

“Well I'm not a fucking kid now am I?” He practically growls out. Louis frowns at the use of profanity and bites his tongue. It was weird to hear the darker boy use them after not speaking like so in over a week.

“Ha..We ordered your favorite...cheesy chicken pizza!” Harry tries to divert the subject, which causes Zayn to roll his brown eyes.

“ Lets cut to the chase. Are you guys disgusted with me or are you going to snatch the damn binky from my mouth when I'm having a nap?” Harry frowns slightly and blushes brightly at the mention of the pacifier.

“No, no. We've had a thought 'bout it and realize its your life. You can make the decisions that are right for you. And we would like to be your friend and be apart of that journey with you. So do you forgive me, zeeboo?“ Louis sighs in relief at the revelation. Zayn, looks over at Louis for confirmation of forgiveness. Louis smiles and gives him a reassuring nod. He sighs and silently forgives him, but however he stays quiet on the topic. 

“Pizza is here.” Is all he says. The waitress smiles at him as she sits down the pizzas and wings.

“Can I get you anything to drink, handsome? We have a special of soda pop right now.” Zayn smiles sweetly at her.

“Oh yeah, tell me whats my options.” She giggles.

“Um, Cherry vanilla coke, sprite, um...” Louis cuts her off.

“He'll have a sprite. Thanks. “ She nods once and looks at Zayn again. She waves at him as she licks her lips. Zayn laughs softly.

“Sprite! He's taken!” Louis practically yells. She blushes and stumbles away. Niall and harry both laugh at Louis's antics.

“What? He cant enjoy female attention anymore?” Niall questions.

“Yeah, she was just being friendly, Lou.” Zayn pipes in. Louis frowns at himself. He hadn't thought about how he would treat big Zayn compare to little Zayn. He has always been a bit protective of him but he never really thought about him being possessive over the lad. 

“No she was flirting with you, there's a difference.” Louis says sternly. He didn't even understand why he was being so emotional about this. He takes a deep breath and looks at Zayn, who was pouting slightly.

“Alright. We haven't discussed this yet, so, any rules or anything that I need to know? If that made you uncomfortable, I'm sorry for over stepping.” Zayn blushes brightly and shakes his head.

“No, Lou. No.” Louis raises any eyebrow and rubs the boys thigh comfortingly.

“No what? I don't understand, babe?” 

“I'm sorry daddy! Please don't be mad! I didn't mean to be bad.” The thought of possible angry his daddy hurt his heart. Harry and Niall both gasps and their eyes widen at the sudden change. Harry was more shock by the usage of the word daddy than the fact he sounded like a complete toddler. Louis's heart instantly softens at the pleas of his baby.

“Oh no, love! I'm not angry at all. Just concerned. Daddy has to protect you at all costs. I was just worried. You never know what she would do with you.” Zayn nods slowly, only understanding some of what his daddy says. He leans against him and hugs him tightly, sniffling softly.

“Baby, look at me.” Zayn looks up at him, his eyes glossy and wide.

“Remember what I said though? You've gotta be a very big boy whilst we have lunch today.” He whines, tears present in his eyes, he shakes his head rapidly.

“No, don't wanna be big!” Louis tsks at the raise in Zayn's voice.

“Uh uh. Don't raise your voice at Daddy. Now, you do what I say or you wont get any presents.” Zayn whines, near to tears, he pulls away and folds his arms. Not realizing Harry and Niall were watching on at their interactions. 

“Are you big now baby?” Louis says after a couple minutes of silence. Instead of saying anything, Zayn picks up a slice of pizza and takes a bite. Louis sighs. He hated when he couldn't tell what head space Zayn was in. It definitely made things more difficult and he was often more upset or moody during these times. Louis looks up at his two friends and grins.

“Amazing, huh? Sweetest. Always concerned. Loves being little though.” He rubs Zayn's leg comforting. The boy simply stayed quiet as he chewed the pizza. He loved cheesy chicken pizza!

Harry and Niall decided to bring the conversation to something light, so they started talking about football and TV. Zayn ignored most of the conversation as he was in and out of his head space.

“So Zee, when do you go back to school?” Zayn's eyes widen at the mention of university. He shrugs and keeps eating.

“I'm not. I dropped out. 'm not going back.” Niall gasps and looks at Louis.

“Oh really? How do you feel about that, Lou?” Louis frowns and looks at Zayn.

“I didn't actually know about this. But I support him 100%. He doesn't have to study if he doesn't want to. He has me and his art. He can be successful without Uni.” Zayn grins at him and pecks his cheek. Harry bites his lip as he feels that familiar jealousy rise in his stomach.

“I agree. We both will support you 100%.” Zayn smiles gratefully at Harry.

“So, Zee, any rules?” Louis asks again, since he didn't quite get an answer the first time. Zayn blushes faintly. And hides in Louis's neck. He mumbles something and Louis raises an eyebrow.

“Don't be shy. Come on, love.” Zayn blushes.

“I don't have any. Just don't be mean or say any condescending words. Then I'll be happy.” Louis frowns at this.

“Zee, did that happen to you when you were a child?” He asks, hesitatingly. He groans.

“Please no, Louis. You're doing so good. I'm so happy. And you're amazing. Just keep doing what you're doing.” Louis smiles and kisses the brown eyed boy's cheek.

“I love you baby. Can I buy you stuff like bottles, sippy cups, toys, and things like that?” Zayn blushes and nods quietly.

“I don't mind those..” Louis grins widely. 

“We're going to have so much.”

The rest of lunch goes on without any more fuss and just simple chatter amongst the friends. Niall groans about harry leaving him again. He states that he'll have to find him a room-mate cause he likes the company. Zayn ignores most of the rest as the grown up conversation was boring his little mind.

“You said we were leaving. Come on daddy?” Zayn whines as he tugs on Louis's sleeve. Niall laughs at him.

“What an impatient little bugger.” Zayn pouts, feeling ignored as Louis simply rolled his eyes at his antics.

“Alright, Haz is goin' come with us right now and come by to collect his other stuff later.” Niall nods, feeling a bit sad but mostly happy at the change.

“Alright, lets go get Zee home, since he is a bit agitated.” Zayn sighs happily, now that they were finally leaving.

Maybe things can be good again.


	10. Before Times & New Beginnings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A blast into the past & a glimpse into the future.

13 YEARS EARLIER 

“Asha! You're going too fast!” The little boy whined as he ran after his older sister, trying to keep up with her fast pace. 

“No time Zee, we've gotta hurry before Safra gets upset!” Zayn continues to whine as he is dragged along the food court to meet up with his other sister. It was a regular thing for the three to eat lunch together. Zayn's sisters knew he struggled to make friends so they always wanted to help him out however they could.

“Hey Safra!” Asha says as they finally reach the table.  
“Oh, um hey Asha..and Zee. You alright?” Zayn frowns at the table, noticing a bunch of new faces he hadn't seen before.

“Yeah, who's your friends?” Asha asks as she takes her seat.

“Um, they're my new friends, is all. Hey, look, I would love to hang with you two. But I cant. I'm busy today. You guys gotta go sit with your own friends today.” Asha frowns, hurt by her sisters confession, but knowing better than to make a fuss, she nods and grabs Zayn's hand again.

“Alright. That's fine.” And with that she turns on her heels, pulling the confused raven haired boy with her.

“Ash? Ash? A? Asha! I don't understand!” Zayn whines to his slightly older sister.

“I know Zayn. I know.” He looks up at her with wide eyes, ready for her to tell him why Safra kicked them from their table.

“Tell me then.” He says after a couple minutes of silence.

“You still wont understand, Zee. You never understand.” The younger one frowns at his sister. 

“I do too! I'm not a baby! I understand 'lot of things!” He yells, attracting attention to the table. Asha rolls her eyes.

“Hush! You don't have to yell. She is just growing up and need her own friends and space now.” Zayn looks at her with a questioning look. Why couldn't they all just be friends? Why did she have to talk to them alone.

“Well. She's still our friend. Cause she's our sister.” Zayn says finally. Asha laughs and shakes her head.

“Not that simple. Don't worry, you'll still go on loving her and hanging out with her. While I'm left to do the yelling.” Zayn's eyes widen.

“No yelling, A! Mummy doesn't like yelling.” Asha giggles and takes out her lunch.

“Yeah, yeah, lets eat, before we gotta go back to class.”

Zayn pouts and watches his older sister eat. It always confused him when things changed. Routines and all. He didn't really get what Asha was trying to say about Safra. He didn't really understand why they weren't eating together but he wouldn't dare make a fuss about it. Especially when he told his big sister that he understand. He sighs loudly.

“Can we go home now?” Asha frowns.

“No, Zee. Its camp. We stay here for two whole weeks.” Zayn's big brown eyes start to water at that realization. He shakes his head and slides his thumb in his mouth. Willing himself not to cry.

“Uh uh. No, no. take your thumb out, Zee. You're almost 6. No more.” This comment only makes the younger one more sad. He shakes his head and slides under the table. Thinking the thick white rectangle above him will mask out his loud screams. He shuts his tightly as he places his skinny arms over his head and cries loudly. He doesn't really know why he is crying, except for the fact that he is confused and wants his mummy.

Asha sits there as she ponders what to do. She frowns and slides under the table with the younger boy.

“Baby, Stop crying. You're gonna get us in trouble.” This only makes little Zayn cry more. Why should he get in trouble for crying? His mummy never yelled at him for crying.

“Zaynie, zaynn..Shhhhh.” Asha picks him up and sits him in her small lap. She rubs his back gently. 

“Mumma's coming. She always comes yah know.” Zayn continues to cry with the comfort of his older sister. After what seemed like forever to the little lad, a teacher finally appeared and took them both from under the table.

“Come on, babe? What's all those tears about?” Zayn looks up at the tall pale woman. He blinks his wet eyes and looks at his sister. Asha sighs loudly.

“He wants to go home. He hates being away from me mum.” The pale woman frowns at the small children.

“Well that is a problem, hm?” She starts to think of ways to distract the younger boy to make his time better.

“Okay! We're gonna go out and have arts in just about 5 minutes. So how about I give a few biscuits and then you can show me how talented you are!” Asha eyes light up at the proposal. 

“Oooh please! I love paints!!” Zayn frowns, feeling as his sister was also about to leave him.

“No! Wanna go home, Asha!” Asha frowns.

“Zee, we can paint it'll be so much fun!” Zayn frowns and rubs his eyes, trying to stop the tears from coming.

“No, please. Wan' mumma.” The camp leader frowns and picks up the small boy.

“Alright. How about we go and give your mummy a ring, while Asha here, waits for us in the Arts room.”

Zayn nods as he lays his small head on the woman's shoulder. She carries the small boy to the office and sits him on the desk. 

“Alright, lets get her number.” She says to herself more than to him. Zayn slides his thumb in his mouth as he looks around the small room. 

One corner. Two corners. Three. Four corners. A picture of a flower. A picture of words. A plant in the first corner. A bin by the desk. A large brown desk.

“Hello, is this Mrs. Malik?” Zayn looks over at the pale woman.

“Hi, I'm Miley. I'm of the camp leaders. Zayn seems to be having an awful time and doesn't want to participate anymore. I understand you may be far out and probably wouldn't be able to pick him up. However, maybe you could talk to him and make him feel a bit better.” She laughs softly.

“Alright, here you go.” She hands Zayn the phone. He stares up at her with wide eyes and places it by his ear.

“Mum?” Hanna smiles at the soft voice.

“Hello, my love. What's the matter?” Zayn smiles and bites his lip.

“Zee, I know you're there. I can hear you're breathing. Why were you upset? Weren't you with Asha and Safra?” Zayn whines and rubs his eyes. He mumbles something incoherently.

“Zaynie, use your words.” He sighs.

“Wanna come cuddle with you. Don't like it here.” She sighs.

“Alright. Alright. But if I come you cant ask to go back. Safra and Asha are gonna want to stay.” He whines again.

“Please, Can you come and get me, mumma?” She smiles at her polite son.

“Of course. Anything for you, baby.”

Present Day

“Zee! Please settle down!” A flustered Harry yells as little Zayn runs all around the living room. He had made a huge mess. Pillows, blankets, and toys were everything. He woke from his nap in a really good mood. He was feeling very energetic and most of all, loved. 

Zayn giggles and hops onto the couch. He jumps up and down as he continues to giggle.

“Come join Haz!!” Harry sighs and runs a hand through his hair. He was wondering what was taking Louis so long to pick up some pizza. He must have been gone over an hour.

“No, get down, right now!” Zayn ignores him and keeps jumping. He starts jumping from one seat to the other.

“Haz! Its fun! Come on!” Zayn was starting to get annoyed that harry wouldn't play with him. He jumps on the coffee table. 

“Alright, get down! Louis will be here any minute. We've gotta clean up your mess.” Zayn frowns and folds his arms.

“You're no fun! You're mean!” Harry laughs lightly. Is he really having this conversation with him?

“Babe, have you seen your mess? You know I hate messes.” Zayn ignores him and stares at the vase on the table. 

“Ha! I know how I can get him to listen!” Little Zayn thinks. He kicks the vase hard, making it crash into the fire place and break into pieces. Harry gasps, his eyes widening every so slightly. He gives Zayn a pointed look.

“That was very naughty.” He says lowly. His quiet, yet stern voice made him shake in fear. 

“I'm sorry Hazzy..” Zayn says quietly. Harry shakes his head and takes Zayn from off of the table.

“Lets go.” Zayn pouts. And lets Harry drag him upstairs. He was worried about what was to happen, but he was scared to say anything. Harry opens Zayn's bedroom door and pulls him into the corner in the room.

“Sit here for 20 minutes. No buts, no noise. No moving. Understand?” Zayn frowns at him, staring at him with wide eyes. This would be his first punishment since staring age play with Harry and Louis.

“But, I didn't..” Harry gives him a stern look as he sits him down.

“No buts. You did a naughty thing and didn't listen when I told you stop walking all over the furniture.” Zayn looks away, feeling a bit bad now. Yet, he doesn't stop himself for talking back.

“I hate you! I wish you stayed with Niall! I wan' daddy!” He yells in Harry's face. The older boy frowns at the younger one. He, being a bit wiser, knows he's lashing out because he is upset. However, the words still sting.

“Okay. I'm starting the timer. Every time you talk I'll add two minutes. Every time you move, ill add 5 minutes. So you best to listen.” He pulls out his phone and starts the timer. 

Zayn hides his face in his arms as he wills himself not to cry. He didn't really do anything! Maybe he was a little mean to Harry. But only because he made him sit in a corner. And even daddy never does that.

Harry sits on the bed as he waits for Zayn to take his punishment. He looks at his phone and texts Louis,

“Where r u? Zayn has gotten into some trouble.” Louis is quick to text back, surprised at the mention of Zayn getting into trouble.

“What do you mean? I'm done the road.” Harry sighs in relief. He didn't think watching Zayn by himself would be so exhausting. He looks over at the raven haired boy and sees he is in the same position as he left him in. He shakes his head. It was quite a nice experience but definitely different.

“Only 10 more minutes, Zee.” He gets up and walks out of the room. Harry goes into the living room and starts picking up Zayn's mess. He never thought one person could be so messy. 

As he was tidying up, Louis walks in quietly and shuts the door behind him. He sits the pizza down on the table as he watches Harry tidy the house. He grins to himself, forgetting why he rushed inside in the first place. He checks his boyfriend out. His abs clenching as he bends to pick up all the pillows off the floor. His tush sticking up in the air as bend under the couch to pick up the remaining blocks. The small look of concentration written on his face. 

His boyfriend. Beautiful as ever doing simple house hold things. Taking care of Zaynie. For him. Because of him. His smile starts to falter when he remembers Zayn had given him trouble.

“Babe?” Harry looks up and smiles as he straightens the couches with its proper pillows and folds the last blanket.

“Hey babe. You alright?” Louis nods and walks over. He wraps his short arms around his boyfriend's torso.

“I'm doing just fine. How're you and Zee? I didn't understand your texts.” Harry sighs and hugs him back, kissing his head gently. 

“He just made a really big mess and wouldn't settle down. He was bouncing all over the furniture and when I told him to stop, he kick the vase off the table and broke it. Louis frowns. He was at a lost to why Zayn decided to act out whilst he was gone.

“Alright. Lets go talk to him. Where is he?” Harry bites his lip. He was nervous to tell him that he punished the younger lad.

“He's in time out...” Louis frowns. He'd figure Harry would doe something like this. He didn't blame him, but it's Zayn. You just have to tell him No and why you don't like something and he'd do it. Was punishing him really necessary?

“Okay. You felt like thats what you had to do.” he sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “lets go see him, yeah?” Harry nods and takes his hand. They both walk upstairs ad into the room. Louis smiles at his patient little boy. He lets go of Harry's hand and walks over t the boy. He sits down in front of him and sighs quietly.

“Hey, baby boy.” Zayn looks at him, his eyes wide and watery.

“Daddy..” He whines. He looks back at Harry and frowns. “Daddy...” Louis frowns and picks him up. 

“Alright. You going to tell me what happened?” He whines and hides his face in Louis's chest. 

“Hazza.” He laughs lightly and Looks at Harry. Harry shrugs and sits down beside Louis.

“What did he do?” Zayn looks up at Louis and pouts.

“Put me in here.. alone..”

“Hmm. And what did you do that made him do that?” Zayn frowns and shakes his head.

“I didn't mean to. It was accident! But hazza didn't want to pway. He's bowing!” Louis laughs loudly. Harry rolls his eyes.

“But, thats no reason to have a fit and break things in the house. Now, is it?” Zayn pouts and shakes his head.

“No..” Louis nods as he gathers himself together.

“Exactly. So what do you owe Harry?” He sighs.

“I'm sowwy, Haz..” Harry smiles softly.

“You're forgiven, love. I expect you not to do anything like that again, yeah?” Zayn nods slowly.

“I wont. I no like time out.” Harry laughs softly and hugs the little boy.

“I'm sure you don't.”

“Okay! Now that everything is sorted, lets go have...pizza!! And maybe even.. ice cream!!” Zayn jumps up and squeals.

“Yay! I love pizza! And Ice cream! Yay! Thank you, daddy. Thank you!” He jumps on Louis, causing Louis to fall back on the floor. He laughs and tickles the boy.

“Of course, you silly boy.” Zayn giggles at Louis as Harry looks on at them. He smiles contently.

He could get use to this new life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully this helps you better understand Zayn and his past. He has had a different upbringing than most and has been emotionally scared. You will learn more later. I hope people are still interested..I know i might be..boring as of right now but im sorry.

**Author's Note:**

> It will be a little slow in the beginning with the Age Play, because no one knows yet. Also! If you don't like this kind of stuff, please don't read! I obviously own no rights to the boys of one direction. I am simply using them as characters in a completely fictional story.


End file.
